But this psychological artifact can be relied upon to continue seeking for a better and more secure self. Nothing real can stand up to scrutiny and will discover, sooner or later, that we just can’t find this always elusive ME. This sense of ‘me’ may be a needed condition for life, but it is not our intrinsic identity.
In its last stand, the ego will hold onto the deepest and most subtle illusion of self. It will be that quality of self that you are most attached to as well as most blind to. It is the last refuge of the illusory self. If approaching it does not create anxiety, jf it doesn’t make you tense, then have probably not found the root of the false self. The deepest root of the self is that which we are most blind to. It is, in the language of Liberation from the Lie, the “mother” of all fear-selves. It is this false persona you will ultimately need to discover.
But there are other pathways.
Notice how the self is always needing to grab onto something – anything. It always needs to be getting somewhere. It needs to be coming from someplace. It needs to take a position on this or that. Or, if you’re a spiritual person, it needs to be not taking a position on his or that.
Now contrast all of that activity with simple, awareness.
Does awareness need to go anywhere? Does awareness come from anyplace? Can awareness come or go anywhere? Does awareness need to take a position on anything? No to each of these questions.
Now here’s the key – this is the place where nearly all of us make a wrong turn. When we hear about awareness we will usually veer off away from awareness and onto its content.
So let’s make this very simple. This is content:
and the biggest and most important content will always be:
When we identify with content, we are addicted to outcomes. We want to get past the current situation. We’re constantly looking forward or guarding against the next moment. We desire content. We fear content. We are bored with content. We want better content. We believe we deserve a certain type of content. On and on it goes. This is SUFFERING!
Now this is the end of suffering.
This is Awareness:
This picture is, of course, a total distortion, because it too is content. Awareness is that which never comes or goes, that cannot be measured, that has no flavor or color or sound. Awareness has no feeling, but it gives birth and life to everything in the universe. The instant we stop identifying with content and live as awareness in that same moment we are free of all suffering. But as long as there is any quality of seeking, we will be blocked from experiencing direct awareness. Instead what will appear as awareness will simply be the seeker as observer and witness. That is not the same thing. As I’m sure you probably know by now, that’s just going in circles.
Awareness requires no effort. All it takes is a recognition of how addicted we are to content. And the main content is ME. How will this effect me? What’s in it for me? All you really need to do is to disengage with this ME content. The rest will unfold automatically.