Posts Tagged compulsion
How often does it happen? A normally quiet man loses his job, his wife leaves him, he abruptly receives a person-to-person call from the devil and what does he do? He gets his beloved gun kills his kids, his wife, and then turns the beloved gun on himself. Then there is the inner city drug dealer. Somebody disses him. What could the dealer do? He had to waste the asshole.
Then there’s the young woman who lives at the gym. She can’t ever get that disobdient body whipped into shape. If she sluffs off just one day, her body and her life will go to hell. Nothing comes between her and her body.
Then there is the star football player. He just has to be the best. He won’t let wimps and their loser laws get in his way. Steroids are key. Gotta be big. Gotta be strong.
You see when you believe, down deep, that you’re nothing, then you just gotta be something. It’s almost the American Way. When that man got out that gun and started killing the people that meant “more to him than anything in this world”, he was not only kidding himself with nice sounding homilies, but more importantly, he was fully living the Lie that he was no one (this is the Lie in the title of my book Liberation from the Lie). When that gym rat takes up residence at the local LA Fitness, she believes that unless she dedicates her life to endless work-outs nature will takes it course and force her to look unlovable. She won’t attract the love she so desperately needs. She will descend into the agony of the much more powerful belief in her own ugliness and unlovability. When that star atheltete poisons his body with steroids, he is compelled by the belief that unless he’s the best, then he is like everyone else, a loser, a nobody.
Down deep they each believe that they are inadequate – a nobody. They are all driven to be adequate – somebody. Violence and the need to achieve; they are, essentially, the same drive manifested in different ways.
What are you compelled to prove? You see when your main belief is in your nothingness, your unlovability, your inadequacy, your life will be organized around countering that belief. This is the life that pursues happiness with desperation, that pursues personal enlightenment with desperation, this is the life of the workaholic, this is the life of nearly all of us.